Betty claws her way out of the Pit of Despair and peers around, blinking like an owl in the sunlight – and twitching, definitely twitching. A nervous tic above her right eye, yes. She looks around furtively and checks over her shoulder, then lays a finger to quivering lips.
Sssssshhhhhhh, don’t tell anyone I’m here, she says.
The blog sits impassively. Betty throws caution to the wind and flings herself at it, squealing with delight.
Oh, little blog! How I have missed you! It feels like forever – I’m so so sorry! It’s been just dreadful.
The blog stares blankly. Betty looks hurt.
Oh, come on, don’t be like that – I don’t have long. I have to be back in Reporting Hell soon. I just snuck out for a quick visit – I’ve been so desperate. Couldn’t get out any earlier coz I was stuck in Marking Hell, and that’s one level deeper than Reporting Hell.
She looks at the clock on the wall and grimaces, then starts babbling.
I’ve been doing the numbers. Listen to these –
I’ve been doing the numbers. Listen to these –
The number of 12-hour days I’ve worked in the last few weekends - 3The number of days last weekend that I was too sick to do any exam marking at all - 3The number of exams I marked between 4.30am Tuesday and 1pm Wednesday of this week - 3The number of days I got to school at 7.30am and didn’t leave before 6pm - 13The number of days I got to school before 7.30am and didn’t leave till after 6.30pm - 2The number of Year 10 reports I wrote - 50+The number of Year 11/12 reports I wrote - 50+The number of other people’s reports I proofread/edited - 100+The number of tutor group reports I have yet to write - 20+The number of times I thought about walking out and never going back - 20+
The blog’s upper lip starts quivering. It’s only human, after all. Betty flings her arms around it again.
Yes, it’s been horrible – horrible! But guess what? There have been some bright spots in there – like diamonds twinkling in a bucket of shit. I haven’t got time to tell you about them, but as soon as I get out of Reporting Hell I will. Here’s a hint: motorbikes!
On hearing the word motorbikes, the blog relaxes. Betty is still carrying her walking stick everywhere, but only using it for minimal support these days, and is booked in for another xray.
That stubborn bone will surely be mended by now, thinks the blog. Perhaps then, Madwoman Betty will calm down, cheer up, chill out.
That stubborn bone will surely be mended by now, thinks the blog. Perhaps then, Madwoman Betty will calm down, cheer up, chill out.
Betty seems to read its mind, and laughs maniacally. An unseen force begins pulling her backwards. She scrabbles for balance, but is drawn, almost magnetically, kicking and screaming, towards the bleak, swirling vortex that will drag her back down to Reporting Hell for another week.
The blog pricks up its ears. It’s sure it hears Betty’s voice piping through the swirling miasma:
I’ll be baaaaaaaaaack!
I’ll be baaaaaaaaaack!
3 comments:
About bloody time lass - a few of us have been fretting a bit. Welcom back to the blogosphere!!!!
Your commitment to teaching is more than inspiring. Jennie's an ex-teacher so I understand completely.
Take care of yourself and allow plenty of "me" time. No-one's going to thank you for work way beyond the call....
Aw, thanks Geoff :-) I'm struggling through the last eight tutor group reports, and it's like pulling teeth, only worse lol. The closer I get to the end, the higher the mountain seems! I want to poke out my own eyeballs with something pointy! I'm determined to have the rest of this done my sundown though. Might just go for a quick hobble (or a slow walk)round the block to get some fresh air first though, before I expire from boredom. Aaaaaargh!
Hooray! :-)
Post a Comment