All Thumbs as a New Year Begins

Last year I was sick - so sick that New Year came and went and I'd forgotten to make any resolutions - I was jubilant! At the time I said:

Resolutions are a yearly reminder of my total inability to stick with anything that might improve me as a person. Annually I resolve to be tidier, to lose weight, to exercise, to save more and to drink less - and annually I don't do any of these things. My resolve lasts anything from 10 minutes to about 3 weeks before I inevitably slide back into my shambolic lifestyle, a glass of red in hand and my feet up on the coffee table. If I bother to remove my bike boots I'll notice there are holes in my socks - and I won't even care.

No such nifty resolution-avoiding excuses this year - I am disgustingly healthy - but I decided to be sparing with my resolutions anyway, in the hope I might actually keep them. I ended up making just one - but it turned out to be the wrong one.

'Worry Less', I said.

It should've been Cook Less.

Why? Well.... after the excesses of this holiday season I have regained a little of the blubber I lost in my '7kgs competition' with my mate Lucy, down at the Fun Factory. But that's not why I should've resolved to cook less.

In order to kick-start the return to weight loss competitiveness, and to clean out my system after all those daiquiris and barbecued sausages I decided to make a giant pot of that

fabulous
fat-burning
fart-making
detoxing
delicious
super duper
special cabbage soup - and that was the problem.

I knew I should've resolved to cook less.

Cooking is a health hazard. The knife slipped as I was chopping the cabbage and I sliced into the tip of my thumb, through skin and nail, and I don't even know how deeply I cut coz it looks gross and I didn't want to be poking about at it with all that blood running out anyway. I couldn't see any bits of thumb in the pile of chopped cabbage, though - and I didn't even bleed on the cabbage, so the soup was safe!

I rinsed it and rinsed it and poured iodine over it (my thumb, not the cabbage) and it didn't make me scream, so I figured it wasn't as bad as it looked, didn't warrant a trip to the emergency room with something nasty in a bag of ice, and would probably be ok.

See? I'm already worrying less!

Happy New Year!
PS The soup is delicious - look out, Lucy - I'm going to kick butt in the 7kg comp!
PPS My thumb hurts.